I told him where we were at: that we wanted kids but felt uncomfortable about the idea of having an anonymous biological father out there.
Being a uterus-rich and sperm-poor couple, the question was less “when” and more “how.” I don’t remember exactly how it came up, but I imagine I asked Matt that annoying and cliché question (feeling I was close enough to him not to have it count as annoying or cliché) and he asked me back what our plans were. You know how when a couple gets married they immediately get bombarded with nosey, inappropriate questions about when they’re going to have kids? Something about big-step ceremonies triggers people to think about the next big step, I guess. He was hilarious, feminist, kind, responsible, intelligent, and witty. We adored the man she had just committed to in front of the aquarium’s tank of beluga whales. My wife Liz and I still had our teal bridesmaids dresses on, basking in the glow of how special it had been to stand together (weeping) with the friend who had officiated our own wedding two years earlier. After the reception a bunch of us from the bridal party were hanging out in a hotel room with the couple of honor. It all started at the wedding of this best friend, Tracy, and her brand new husband, Matt.
